Saturday, May 26, 2007

The Jaguar Shark

what i'm listening to right now: Home- Eric Bachmann
Okay, so I was writing a really angry post about all these pointy headed fools driving their impractical cars and filling them up with gas that's at impractical prices. It makes me fairly angry, I'll admit. It's a little ridiculous, I'm raging against a societal problem that's endemic, it's like railing against what I think is the worst atrocity that television has ever planned to commit against the American citizenry, Pirate Master. A "reality" show that is a contest set on a "pirate" boat. I'm just offended at the very idea of the idea. It's staggering. But, it's gonna continue to happen. And people are probably gonna lap this shit up. Therein lies the pointlessness of my getting upset about this. Not to get all fucking elitist asshole about this, but if you see someone eating shit, and you tell them they're eating shit... they're gonna get upset at you, because they've been eating shit their whole life, and they're gonna get upset with you for telling they're eating shit, they've been told that this is award winning so and so, and who am I to come along and tell them it's shit? It's all liberal media.

Damn. If I could come off as more of an asshole elitist, I'd have to slap a Nicholas Sparks book out of the hands of a paraplegic. Sorry.
So, I really tried to just drain my self righteous anger out of this post twice, and that's the best I could do. So, umm, hey, how's it going? It's a beautiful day outside, isn't it? I walked to the bank and to get some coffee this morning. Yeah, you know, don't want to pollute and line the pockets of oil barons... fuck, there I go again, I was trying to be civil, and once again... asshole.

Oh, I know! Yesterday, Amanda and I got our present for each other in the mail. A refurbished 80G video ipod. Very exciting. Our old ipod had been filled to it's brim. So it was time for a new one. Getting a refurbished one was a pretty good idea. It's recycling, which is always good. And it come out good as new, with the same warranty as a new one. I was really surprised how good of a shape it was in. I was expecting a few scratches here and there, maybe it would have lost some of it's shine or something, but this thing was shiny as hell. Just really nice. I am very happy with it. I was very eager to test out the video capabilities of the ipod, so I downloaded the only free video on iTunes that interested me at all, an episode of the guiltiest of all guilty pleasures, Pimp My Ride. Which, in the process of looking for a good picture from the show, I found out that they made a video game out of the show. Which could have been awesome, but you know, following my thread from earlier in this post, which, I'm only going to allude to, in the interest of keeping my blood pressure down, isn't so awesome. You know, the show, though, that's a good time. I almost always find myself arguing with what the over the top mechanics are doing, "who needs that many televisions next to the oil pan?" "why would you paint a picture of your mother on a stranger's car?" I ultimately am drawn in, and can't turn away. I haven't had cable for well over a year. It seems, though, every time I turn on a tv with cable, it's in the middle of a Pimp My Ride marathon. Which I usually watch for hours on end. In latching onto the mental pacifier of Pimp My Ride, am I not, myself, eating shit? Of course I am. We all eat shit, just different flavors, and we're certain that whoever isn't eating our flavor, is eating the real, non-metaphorical shit. So, every thing's shit? Am I a self-loathing elitist? Is that what a populist is?
* so, the original intent from the beginning of this post was that I was looking for a good synonym for idiot. idiot's a great word, it's just kind of plain, so I went to, which is kind of a cop-out, I could have just sat there and thought about it for a minute, but, you know, that's the beauty of this Internet flavored shit that we eat. anyway, I ended up with pointy headed. which is fantastic, in the process though, I found out what you could file in "learn something new everyday" an idiot is a stupid person with a mental age below three years, while a moron is a stupid person with a mental age of between seven to twelve years an idiot is a stupid person with a mental age below three years, while a moron is a stupid person with a mental age of between seven to twelve years... how interesting is that? is that scientific? it's surely not nice.

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